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Change Your Inner Conversations to Control Your Anger
Every Holiday season Vicki found herself angry and silently seething at her older sister, Susie, and mother as they were merrily chatting about Susie's successful life. Thanksgiving was no exception. Vicki had to sit stoically while Mom praised...

Doing What You Love To Do To Be Successful
Who am I and what do I love to do? Well, isn't this the twenty million dollar question! A more appropriate question might be "Who was I and what did I love to do?" As you search to find yourself, and what it is you love to do, you may find the...

Healing and Transformation
Every symptom has a certain way of being with which it is associated. In order to release a symptom, one must release the way of being associated with it. Thus, the process of healing implies a process of transformation. Anything can be...

How to Make a Joint Venture Successful
Question: What was your first successful JV, and what were the steps you took to make it successful? Hello. This is Valerie Vauthey speaking. I am the CEO & Founder of the fastest growing coaching company in North America and Europe:...

Why a Self Help Book May Not Help You
For a self help book to work, we have to read right it through to the end. While this may seem like a no-brainer, many people never finish reading books that they buy. In fact many people never read a book after they finish high school. The next...

 
Surprising Secrets of Wallpaper

I now know the origination of the term "ugly as sin" - it's the wallpaper in the half-bath of the house I moved into. Okay, being from the South, let me re-phrase the statement and say that my tastes differ greatly than those of the previous owners. This has been one of my priority projects - to change the look (basically remove the hideous wallpaper).

I consulted with several experts about removing the wallpaper. Most of them rolled their eyes, clutched their hearts, and commented, "are you really sure you want to do that?" as the color was quickly draining from their faces. "Do you know what you are in for?" Obviously ignorance was bliss. I consulted more experts who enlightened me to the concept of painting over the wallpaper. They graciously provided step-by-step instructions.

In theory, it was a great idea to paint over the wallpaper. What I didn't consider in the plan was the change in color. The wallpaper was black (really!) and I wanted yellow walls. Three coats later, I had gone from hideous to something words can't quite capture in the realm of ugly.

Now, I am back to taking the wallpaper, (plus primer and three coats of paint) off the walls. I have tried every commercial product and removal device and have found that old-fashioned elbow grease is the best method. It is taking time and effort, and each day I am closer to the yellow walls and completed project.

So why take the time to share this experience? This is so much what we do in life. We want (or need to at times) make a change. Sometimes our circle of influence repeatedly reminds of us of how hard and challenging it will be. Often times we opt for the easier method - the quick fix - just paint over what already exists. Just go in any bookstore and you'll find a plethora of quick fixes in the self-help section. What needs to happen is removal of the old patterns, those old tapes we play that don't work anymore.

I admit I wanted the quick fix. It has been hard work to remove the wallpaper. However, I am making tons of progress and am excited to be working on the project. And, it hasn't been as challenging as I thought it would be. I let the removal portion of the project become a huge obstacle that I thought I couldn't get around.

So, what about you? Where are you looking for the quick fix? In what ways would a complete removal of a thought pattern, action, or old tape be best served by being removed?

About the author:

Jan Hinton is a coach, trainer and humorist. If this struck a nerve deep within your heart, but you are too busy to tackle the 'project'; you'll make the changes when you can 'get around to it'; the obstacles you face daily have you overwhelmed, then that's where she can help you the most. She has developed a variety of ways to make changes for busy people like you more palatable, yes, even fun! She is a specialist at doing something no one

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